Most of us never really digest the thought, memory and emotion associated with stressful, painful or traumatic events. Because of that, we end up carrying all of these unresolved issues and emotions in our bodies.
We employ all kinds of addictions and distractions such as television, shopping, food, smoking, drinking and or the use of other drugs to help us numb out by keeping it all pushed down. Or we escape from feeling by living in our head or use spiritual practices to disconnect from the feelings.
Many people come for healing sessions expecting all of their hurts to be magically be taken away. True healing doesnít work that way, otherwise you would never really grow, mature, learn and assume responsibility for your own life.
The healing sessions will gradually bring all these feelings up to the surface so that you can heal these issues. These thoughts, emotions and memories are often unpleasant and sometimes they can be painful. The process taking place may seem a little frightening if we have tended to avoid these issues all of our lives. It can leave us feeling vulnerable, overwhelmed or out of control. Itís normal for these feelings to emerge, especially when we have stuffed so much down inside of us for so long.
The thoughts, feelings, emotions and all the memories that stay trapped in our body-mind become toxic. They can manifests as limiting or destructive patterns in our lives. The undigested backlog congests, numbs and deadens our body-mind causing it to break down. Our body-mind becomes sick and we age faster. And then we pass our toxicity on to future generations. All of our internal responses consisting of thought, feeling, emotion and memory need to digest and assimilate. Breathing soft and deeply as you focus your attention in the middle of these feelings will help you to facilitate this digestive process.
Itís normal to go through some resistance to the process taking place. You may actually experience a feeling of resistance. Part of you may be saying "I donít want to go there". You might also find yourself feeling really scattered, afraid, angry and resentful. And sometimes you come up with all kinds of excuses and distractions to pull yourself away from what needs to be dealt with. The resistant, scattered and avoidant feelings will often dissipate as you breathe into them. Doing so will enable you to be more present with yourself and to life.
I often experience resistance during the vision quests where I go out for the four days and nights with out food and water. All of the emotions stirring beneath the surface create a tremendous sense of agitation that at times makes me want to jump out of my skin. I use to fight the sensation because it felt so uncomfortable. Iíve learned to stop fighting and let go into the agitation. The discomfort can last for hours, but itís a small price considering that I experience the most powerful positive life changes take place during these times.
I like to be proactive by doing everything possible to better myself and my situation. Then there are matters over which I have no control. At times I find myself resisting the things I cannot change. But Iíve learned that what you resist will persist. Thatís because resistance reinforces the unpleasant realities of our lives. Resistance can create even more pain. Sometimes I forget and get caught up in the drama, but more and more Iím catching myself in the act. Iíll ask myself "What are the deepest feelings behind all this?" And then I begin to breathe into the fear, frustration or any other emotions that surface at the time. My intention is to be permeable so that life and everything that I think and feel in response to it can move through me. Being permeable activates a creative generative force that opens doorways and allows new opportunities to manifest. I find this keeps me moving forward.
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